The 15th Dharma Session of Middle Way Buddhist Association: The Dependent Origination in Our Daily Life, Part I (my breakthrough in Meditation)

April 19 was the occasion of the 15th Dharma Session of Middle Way Buddhist Association (MWBA) held at its venue at Pinellas Park on a monthly basis. For the first time, we and all the attendees commenced the pre-Dharma talk meditation on our own, the absence of the guidance by the designated Dharma teacher of the day did not dampen the attendees' enthusiasm nor readiness. Also for the first time, the occasion was graced by a venerable Bikkhuni (Buddhist nun), rather than the usual fare of a venerable Bikkhu (Buddhist Monk) or a male Buddhist lay-practitioner thus far, not that it mattered anyway.

Our Dharma teacher for the day was Venerable Chueh Fan, Director of Guang Ming (Buddha Light) Temple, Orlando, who has graced our home previously.

She was going to deliver a Dharma talk entitled the Dependent Origination in Our daily Life, and was unable to be with us for the meditation session because of her morning duties at Guang Ming Temple. But first, my meditation experience for the morning.

Recently, I have developed a coughing tendency that occurs sporadically. It's a dry cough and usually starts with an itchy sensation at the throat that is relieved by coughing for a brief period, sometimes in a quick succession of loud coughs ending with an involuntary sneeze. I have never tried to fight it but merely cover my mouth to muffle the ensuing noise while in public. It could be just an allergic reaction to the pollen season though I have always thought I'm immune to it.

Sometime during my meditation, I had a bout of tickling sensation at my throat. I tried to suppress the usual relief of coughing for fear of disrupting the enveloping quiet, but the sensation seemed to be gaining the upper hand, building up its intensity with time. At one point, I did open my eyes and wanted to leave the hall so that I could just get the cough out of the way. But something deeper in me was also trying to stay put, and to let the mind exert its control over my bodily function. So I tried to put the ever mounting physical sensation out of the mind, a duel of mind and the body if you will, by focusing on the meditation and elevating my level of mindfulness.

After a time, gradually the physical sensation subsided and slided into oblivion, without me actually knowing its retreat. A victory of the mind over the body, in this instant. But before I could feel smug about my little conquest, the next challenge surfaced. During the duel, a stream of tears started to roll down my cheek, prompted perhaps by the reaction of the body mechanism to seek relief elsewhere.

If you ever have tears rolling down your cheek, you will understand that tickling sensation it generates on the skin in the path of the rolling motion driven by gravity. The natural response would be to use the back of the hand to wipe it off, thereby eliminating the source of the irritation. That would also be a rational move given that no noise is generated. But I was on a roll, and decided to stay motionless, hence initiating another mind-and-body head-to-head clash. And 2-0 for the mind.

While these may seem small conquests in the grand scheme of things, it was no mean feat at the personal level, convincing myself that everything (within reason) is possible if we just put our mind to the task.

Before it was all over, the third challenge arose, again not unexpectedly as I have been “afflicted” before with similar physical stimulation. This time, the battleground moved to the stomach, the often embarrassing and yet seemingly insurmountable physical response. I'm referring to belching, which I will put in the same league as sneezing and yawning as far as involuntary body reactions go.

This time though, the physical phenomenon is so involuntary (spasmatic is perhaps a better word) that there was nothing I could do. Like a knee jerk reaction, the motor muscles just flex beyond the reach of the mind.

Well, two out of three isn't bad. Life is about picking the wars to fight (the strategic frame) while conceding the battles where the outcome is inevitable and more important, inconsequential (the tactical frame). I would consider myself having experienced a small breakthrough, an incremental improvement achieved through constant practice, in my relatively brief journey on meditation thus far.

Do tune in for the concluding part of the Dharma talk proper, featuring Venerable Chueh Fan, in a subsequent blog.

The moment just before the arrival of Venerable Chueh Fan, the attendees, sitting expectantly, suitably refreshed after the meditation session, while listening to Sister Lily on the morning's program. Brother Tom was away helping out in the Change Your Mind Day organized by the Tampa Bay Buddhist Peace Fellowship held at Philippe Park, Safety Harbor on the same day. Some of us would join the blissful activity after the MWBA Dharma session, including Venerable Chueh Fan who was one of the speakers. The proceedings there as I see it would be the subject of yet another blog, thus completing a blogging trilogy of the blissful day of April 19, 2008.